Writing a Heartfelt Eulogy: Tips and Templates for Families

Writing a eulogy is one of the most personal and emotional tasks a person can take on. It’s a speech filled with love, stories, and tribute—one that gives voice to a life well-lived and comforts those who mourn. But when grief feels overwhelming, finding the right words can seem impossible. This guide offers compassionate advice and ready-to-use templates to help you craft a meaningful, memorable eulogy for your loved one.

What Is a Eulogy?

A eulogy is a speech or written tribute typically delivered during a funeral or memorial service. Its purpose is to honor the deceased, reflect on their life, share memories, and offer comfort to family and friends. A eulogy may be delivered by a family member, close friend, spiritual leader, or sometimes multiple people.

Though often solemn, eulogies can also include humor, warmth, and even joy—especially when remembering someone who brought laughter and light to others. The most impactful eulogies are those that feel authentic and come from the heart.

Before You Begin: Reflect and Gather

Before sitting down to write, take some time to reflect. Think about your relationship with the person. What stories come to mind? What made them unique? What values did they live by?

It may help to:

• Speak with other family members and friends for input

• Look through old photos, letters, or keepsakes

• Reflect on any favorite sayings, hobbies, or life lessons

• Consider what the person might have wanted remembered

The goal isn’t to list every fact about their life—it’s to paint a picture of who they were and what they meant to those around them.

How Long Should a Eulogy Be?

Most eulogies are 5 to 10 minutes long when spoken aloud, which translates to about 500 to 1,000 words. It’s okay if yours is shorter or longer, depending on your comfort level and the ceremony’s flow.

Structuring Your Eulogy

A well-organized eulogy doesn’t have to follow a strict format, but a simple structure can help guide your writing:

1. Opening: Introduce yourself and your relationship to the deceased. Thank attendees for being present.

2. Life Story Highlights: Provide key details about their life—birthplace, education, career, family, accomplishments.

3. Personal Memories: Share specific stories, experiences, or characteristics that showcase their personality.

4. Values and Impact: Talk about what they stood for, how they made others feel, or what legacy they leave behind.

5. Closing Message: End with a final tribute, quote, poem, or farewell message.

Tips for Writing a Meaningful Eulogy

Speak from the heart

You don’t need to be a polished writer or public speaker. Your honesty, love, and sincerity will carry more weight than perfect grammar.

Keep it personal and specific

Use anecdotes and examples to bring your loved one to life for the audience. Share the little quirks and beautiful details that made them who they were.

Balance emotion with clarity

It's okay to cry—but if you're delivering the eulogy yourself, practice reading it aloud beforehand to ensure you can get through it (or have someone ready to step in if needed).

Include quotes, poems, or scripture if meaningful

Lines from literature, religious texts, or favorite songs can help express what you’re feeling, especially when your own words fall short.

Write like you speak

Keep your tone conversational and natural. This makes the eulogy easier to deliver and more engaging to listen to.

Edit with care

After your first draft, step away for a few hours or a day. Then read it again, refining for clarity and flow.

Sample Eulogy Templates

Here are two sample templates you can use or adapt for your loved one.

Template 1: For a Parent

Hello, everyone. Thank you for being here today to celebrate the life of my [mom/dad], [Name].

[Name] was the heart of our family—a constant source of strength, kindness, and humor. Born in [hometown], they built a life rooted in love and resilience. Whether they were [career/profession] or baking the world’s best [dish], [Name] did everything with care.

I’ll never forget the way they [anecdote—e.g., read bedtime stories with full voices, stayed up late helping with science projects, cheered at every game]. It wasn’t just about what they did—it was about how they made us feel. Safe. Seen. Loved.

One of [Name]’s favorite sayings was, “[quote],” and it’s a lesson I carry with me every day.

To say we’ll miss them is an understatement. But I find comfort in knowing that their love lives on—in every recipe we pass down, every story we tell, and every act of kindness we pay forward.

Rest easy, [Name]. We love you always.

Template 2: For a Grandparent or Elder

Thank you for being here to honor the life of [Name].

[Name] was more than a grandparent—they were a storyteller, a caretaker, and a walking history book. They lived through [milestones or historical events], and through it all, they never lost their sense of humor or their love for family.

I’ll always remember [anecdote—e.g., how they taught me to fish, knit, garden, or tell jokes]. They had a quiet wisdom and a big laugh—both of which shaped who I am today.

Their home was always open, their hugs always warm, and their stories always worth listening to. In their honor, I want to share one of their favorite [quotes/jokes/memories].

As we say goodbye, let’s carry their legacy with us. Let’s live generously, love fiercely, and remember that we’re part of something greater—something rooted in the love [Name] gave so freely.

What Not to Worry About

You don’t need to cover every moment of a person’s life. You don’t need to speak like a poet. And you certainly don’t need to be perfect. What matters most is that you show up with love and honesty.

People won’t remember every word you say—but they will remember how your words made them feel.

Involving Others in the Eulogy

If you're not comfortable speaking alone or want to include other voices, consider:

• Asking multiple people to share shorter tributes

• Including a group reading or prayer

• Reading a letter or story from someone who can’t attend

This can relieve pressure and also enrich the memorial with more perspectives.

Final Thoughts

Writing a eulogy is a courageous, vulnerable act of love. It brings voice to grief, clarity to chaos, and connection to those left behind. Whether you follow a template or speak spontaneously, your words can offer healing—not just for others, but for yourself.

Take your time, trust your heart, and know that your efforts will be appreciated far more than you realize.

If you’re in need of modern memorial products, keepsakes, or additional planning support, visit Oaktree Memorials. We're here to help families honor their loved ones with dignity, creativity, and care.